


Getting Good at Starting Over, Every Time That I Return

by citizenjess (givehimonemore)



Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Boners and Feelings, Deception, Hardeen-Wan, M/M, Tattoos
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-19
Updated: 2013-09-19
Packaged: 2017-12-27 00:40:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/972268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/givehimonemore/pseuds/citizenjess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anakin needs something from Obi-Wan, following his deception as Rako Hardeen.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Getting Good at Starting Over, Every Time That I Return

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [I Seek to Cure What's Deep Inside (Frightened of This Thing That I've Become)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/727288) by [citizenjess (givehimonemore)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/givehimonemore/pseuds/citizenjess). 



> I kept saying I wanted to write this, and I guess I've been feeling a tad dour lately, because it didn't take much poking and prodding for it to come out this afternoon/evening. Rated R/M for non-graphic sex; also, the Anakin/Obi-Wan slash is strong in this one, kids. Title comes from "Wait" by the Foo Fighters. Dedicated to Rin/lady-anakin-skywalker/ladyanakin, because I think she wanted to see this more than anyone.

"It's an ugly face." 

It's not, really - aside from the tattoo, which hardens already taut cheekbones and makes the whole effect slightly more crude, it's not all that much worse than any other humanoid face, but Obi-Wan knows from whence Anakin's snide remark really comes. He's hurt, devastated and relieved and furious all at once, and quick, mostly harmless jabs about his former Master's temporary facial reconstruction for his latest undercover mission are a better alternative to some of the other ways Anakin could - and, in the past, has - cope with his pain. As such, Obi-Wan allows it, even favors Anakin with a smile that's uncharacteristic on his updated visage.

"It's the face that saved the Republic." It's the line he used on Master Windu not long ago, before they'd stumbled upon the knowledge that Dooku had basically been behind the scheme to draw them out from the beginning, but after Obi-Wan had gotten a taste of just how irreparable the damage caused by his betrayal was; unlike the Vapaad Master's wryly bemused reaction, however, the comment only succeeds in making Anakin scowl further. "It was just a joke, Anakin," he starts to say, but it's too little, too late, apparently, because the young man's eyes flash with barely-veiled anger. 

"Jokes hurt, Master." That Anakin doesn't seem to have the energy to cast around for further explanation is telling. Obi-Wan's stomach roils.

"I know. I'm sorry." It's something he suspects he'll be saying a lot in the near future, never inauthentically, and yet, it's such a woefully understated response to the turmoil he can feel emanating from Anakin in waves. Their forcible separation was difficult for Obi-Wan as well - it's a strange thing being cut off from the Force, and even stranger to realize how much he's come to rely on Anakin's presence within it, however erratic it tends to be - but he knows that for Anakin, it was nothing short of agony. Now, of course, Anakin knows that it was all a ruse, nothing personal, and yet, he also knows that it was precisely Obi-Wan's ability to predict his devastation at even the fabricated reality of his Master's death that caused Obi-Wan to undertake this mission in such a way in the first place, and that burned. 

And yet, he still can't bring himself to articulate all of this. "I know," he repeats simply, dully, and Obi-Wan's face is pinched, although that may be just how Rako Hardeen's face looks; then again, maybe if Obi-Wan looked like Obi-Wan again, he would also be standing here looking pained and stiff and guilty, though even now, his eyes give way to something softer. Anakin wonders, not for the first time, how he could have attributed that wide, clear gaze to anyone except his Master; but then, there are many things that can be attributed to excessive stress and exhaustion, or so Ahsoka had sighed exasperatedly at him after he'd woken up from his Hardeen-Wan's headlock-inspired cat-nap. "It was so obvious," he'd said after regaining consciousness, and Ahsoka had looked startled, but that was probably because, aside from a few grunts and grumbles, it was one of the only things he'd uttered in days. 

Inspired, perhaps, by this recollection, his hands come up now, gripping with gentle firmness at the sides of Obi-Wan's false face. "Anakin," he Master mumbles, and it's a good thing the voice modulator has already been removed, because Anakin's pretty sure they both know the young man would be tempted it to rip it from Obi-Wan's throat if it wasn't. Those eyes widen a little, but Anakin's grip remains where it is, and Obi-Wan finally begins to understand. "I know," he says again, and his voice, his real voice, is nary a whisper, but it's enough. "I know what you need, Anakin," he gets out, and then the wind is all but knocked out of him by the forcible (and probably even somewhat Force-laden) shove against the wall by Anakin, taller and stronger and just having been given Obi-Wan's consent to have, to take him like this. "I can go through the reversal procedure first ..." he offers, just to put it out there, just to make absolutely sure, but Anakin shakes his head briefly.

"No," he mutters, and even though the kisses he's planting along Obi-Wan's bared throat now are soft and fluttery and couldn't hurt a puuri-pittin, the young man's teeth are bared, his voice low and furious. "Not yet," he hisses, "want to see what was so important," and Obi-Wan's chest heaves a little as Anakin all but rips the front of his tunics apart, exposing bare torso to the other man's harsh scrutiny; without looking himself, Obi-Wan knows that Anakin has already committed each new laceration and bruise to memory. The tongue curling along his left nipple offsets his worry somewhat admittedly, however. "Ah," he bites out, and again, he can feel Anakin's self-satisfied smile in the Force before it actually plays up the corners of his mouth.

Anakin resumes standing, and seems to steady himself by staring at Obi-Wan's face; his own eyes trace the tattoo covering most of his Master's forehead; his hands are almost painful, clutching the sides of his head the way they do, but Obi-Wan allows it, and only startles the barest amount when Anakin's mouth attaches to his, teeth clicking, tongue seeking entrance beyond lips and teeth, and Obi-Wan allows that, too. His own hands settle along Anakin's slim waist, and it's almost comforting for a moment, and then Anakin spins him around briefly and there's nothing much to hold onto except the bare expanse of wall, and so his palms sort of press along that. There's rustling behind him, and even though Anakin does not seem to intend to remove his own clothing, when the young man's bare erection presses against him, hard and slicked with something from his former apprentice's utility belt, he's not really surprised. "Yes?" Anakin asks, and Obi-Wan braces himself and nods. 

"Yes." It's harsh fucking, little preparation and lots of conflicting emotions swirling around them in the Force; Anakin's hands clutch and cling, and he doesn't seem to be looking at the sliver of Obi-Wan's fake face that he can see now much at all. Even so, his breath is hot and jagged along Obi-Wan's neck and cheek, and when he comes, his groan is slightly muffled when he presses his forehead against the back of his Master's newly-bared skull. He pulls out and it throbs, and he thinks Anakin's done with him, but then Anakin is turning him around, reaching into the loose, sagging waistband of his pants and pulling out his cock. "That's not necessary," he begins, but then Anakin takes him down his throat in one smooth motion and he decides he could do worse than not talk for a few minutes. Arousal begins to pool in his groin, ... and then Anakin pulls off and looks up at him like a derelict angel.

"Did the Council tell you about your funeral, Master?" It's an incredibly odd question without proper context, and yet. Obi-Wan watches his former Padawan trace the underside of his cock with one finger, and they both notice when it twitches. Anakin smiles, but it doesn't last: "Satine was there," he ruminates, as if rattling off ingredients on a grocery list. "And Padme. And Bail. Did any of them know about the plan?" he asks. "Or did you deceive them as well?" 

"Nobody knew, Anakin." He manages to get it out before the young man begins fondling his balls. "It was crucial to the p-plan that everyone was - aah - kept in the dark." He pauses to swallow hard when Anakin fists his cock with his real hand. "Everyone was deceived," he mutters, and Anakin seems to consider this. "Okay," he says eventually, and his ministrations become stronger until Obi-Wan is practically squirming, upon which Anakin deep-throats his Master anew, and then pulls off and laves the older man's cockhead with the flat of his tongue. There's nothing for it except the obvious power play, but Obi-Wan allows Anakin to bring him to the brink, and then looks down just before his former Padawan sends him over the edge. 

"I'm sorry, Anakin," he says again, and then he's falling; most of his orgasm pools in Anakin's palm and along the young man's fingers, and he grimaces a little as he feels Anakin unceremoniously wipe the excess off along the inside of Obi-Wan's leggings, which he then tugs back into place. 

Obi-Wan refastens his own tunics with the obi that Anakin discarded hastily only scant minutes before, and then blinks at Anakin's own seeming nonchalance, the way the young man stands and almost saunters away. "You should go change your face," his former Padawan suggests, and it's casual, almost playful, though the undercurrent of all that has just passed between them hangs faintly in the air like the aftermath of their coupling. Still, it's a concession, a rare thing from Anakin, and Obi-Wan takes it. 

"Yes. I'll do that." He lets himself out of the apartment, away once more, albeit temporarily, from the young man's erratic energy, and into the crisp air of a typical Coruscant evening, which evaporates the muddled sweat and mostly dried bodily fluids from his skin. It's nice; not long after, he decides that he'll probably take a walk or head to Dex's for a late meal or something after the transformation and his subsequent Council debriefing are complete. He has a feeling Anakin won't wait around for him to return anyways, having already taken what he needed; and as he's come to recognize over the past several days, there are far worse things in this galaxy than being Obi-Wan Kenobi.


End file.
